Of the stories in Interpreter of Maladies, "A Temporary Matter" touched on a matter that I think many of us have wondered, worried about, or even experienced before: what happens when the romance and love fades from a relationship. The strained relationship between Shukumar and Shoba is made apparent to the reader by the second page, and it seemed fairly apparent that the story would end with either them separating or patching things up. But for me, the care and detail that went into the story made it feel almost real. Shukumar's situation isn't only completely possible, it's a common fear many people have about marriage. He feels that he knows his wife so well: her habits, interests, pet peeves, favorite songs, the list goes on. Yet in the end, he doesn't understand her enough. He didn't pick up on the intent behind her game when the lights went out. He didn't understand that she wanted to leave, and she didn't have the heart to tell him she was going moving out until after she worsened the situation by seemingly growing closer to him. The awkwardness of the whole scenario made it that much more real.
Despite having seen the ending coming, it still sent me for a loop. It gave me a brief reminder of that ever-looming question over all relationships: what do you do if the magic dies? What could he have done different to save their relationship? Was he or Shoba more responsible for it falling apart, especially after the miscarriage? It seems like the miscarriage was the turning point in their relationship, after which they became increasingly distant from one another both metaphorically and literally. Perhaps they could have sought couples therapy, perhaps they could have sought comfort in one another instead of distancing themselves, but whatever the could-haves are, the end result is what is how the story ends. And that's what stuck with me long after reading "A Temporary Matter": that the could-haves and should-haves almost always come too late, as products of hindsight. We only have one life (that we for sure know of, at least), only so much time within that lifespan, so what happens if you fall into the doldrums in your 40's? Do you resign yourself to a life with someone you don't love anymore, or do you leave them and trying to find someone else, with the risk of being alone for the rest of your life looming over you? In the end, it's one of those things that only time will tell. However, despite the fears it inspires, I'm glad this story exists to helps us avoid making the same mistakes they did.
Despite having seen the ending coming, it still sent me for a loop. It gave me a brief reminder of that ever-looming question over all relationships: what do you do if the magic dies? What could he have done different to save their relationship? Was he or Shoba more responsible for it falling apart, especially after the miscarriage? It seems like the miscarriage was the turning point in their relationship, after which they became increasingly distant from one another both metaphorically and literally. Perhaps they could have sought couples therapy, perhaps they could have sought comfort in one another instead of distancing themselves, but whatever the could-haves are, the end result is what is how the story ends. And that's what stuck with me long after reading "A Temporary Matter": that the could-haves and should-haves almost always come too late, as products of hindsight. We only have one life (that we for sure know of, at least), only so much time within that lifespan, so what happens if you fall into the doldrums in your 40's? Do you resign yourself to a life with someone you don't love anymore, or do you leave them and trying to find someone else, with the risk of being alone for the rest of your life looming over you? In the end, it's one of those things that only time will tell. However, despite the fears it inspires, I'm glad this story exists to helps us avoid making the same mistakes they did.
Yeah, in a way, "A Temporary Matter" is pretty scary! I was aligned with Shukumar throughout, so I also was pretty surprised when Shoba told him that she would be moving out. Hindsight is 20/20, but at this point neither of them can really do anything. I do think they could have tried to handle their grief better (therapy, honestly, sounds like a good idea), and talk to each other more, but like you said, this is how the story ends.
ReplyDeleteI remember in reading this story, the main thing that I couldn't shake was my irritation at how they seem to have never talked about their growing distance. Instead, the pair both simply individually accept it, and let their distance lead to growing resentment for each other. Perhaps talking through it wouldn't have made any difference on the outcome, but since their troubles appear to begin after the miscarriage, I think there's a decent chance that it could've given them a better chance. Mainly what I took away from this story was the idea that communication truly is important, but at the same time, like you mentioned, sometimes the magic just dies and we can only hope that that doesn't happen to us.
ReplyDeleteI agree about this story seeming very realistic. The fact that the emotional reality of the relationship has become apathy with subtext seems to be somehow more believable than if the characters had engaged in some wild dramatic fight; and I also think the concepts this story touches on are kind of hard to imagine--are most long-term marriages just maintained tolerance of the other person?
ReplyDeleteWhen I think about this story, I am always comparing it to Lorrie Moore's "Another Woman," and like others have mentioned, I liked the aspect of the stories realism, more so than Moore's in fact. One thing that really stood out for me (that was also quite unexpected) was the scene with the child she was babysitting. The scene was both powerful and striking. The idea of the child representing Shukumar and his relationship with Shoba was apparent and impactful in helping Shoba realize the true nature of their relationship, but the idea and events that took place with the child were themselves somewhat odd and at times uncomfortable to read. The combination of these things made the scene very moving and memorable.
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